THERE’S something unequivocally opposite about Megan McKenna. And it’s not only her noticeably reduction trouty pout, that we’ll come to after because, really, how could we not discuss The Lips?
No, aside from all that, a nation thespian who shot to luminary as a unlucky-in-love existence star with a gossamer hold on annoy government (remember that jaw-dropping pretension in a diary room on CBB 2016, for that she was temporarily private from a residence by security?) is a altered woman.
- Blazer, £49, from Topshop – buy now
- Trousers, £36, from River Island – buy now
As she prepares to launch a song career off a behind of The X Factor: Celebrity, she’s calmer, softer, approach some-more receptive and unfit to determine with a seething, screaming, snarling lady viewers of Ex On The Beach, CBB and TOWIE will be informed with.
“I’m a totally opposite chairman these days,” says Megan. “I’ve finished so many flourishing up. we know people see me as Mental Megs – if I’d watched me, I’d think: ‘Oh god, we don’t like her.’ But a law is we was only a broken, dissapoint immature lady and we didn’t unequivocally know what we was removing myself into.
“When we came out of Big Brother and saw it all back, we was like: ‘Oh my god, my mouth! My nan’s going to kill me.’ we only can’t act like that. I’d be perplexing to demonstrate myself, though it would come out all wrong.”
Much of Megan’s disappointment and distress, she says, stemmed from a psychological hangover of carrying been bullied during propagandize – an knowledge that left her with bad self-respect and simmering resentment.
- Blazer, £68, from River Island – buy now
- Trousers, £45, from River Island – buy now
- Earrings and rings, from New Look – buy now
She was indignant and unfortunate and those insecurities came to a front (often with a assistance of alcohol) on existence shows where dispute was annoyed and actively encouraged.
We also saw it occur during her explosive, poisonous 18-month on/off attribute with Pete Wicks on TOWIE and she’s a initial to acknowledge that she was destroyed during doing tragedy – her instinct was always to blow up.
“You’re put into disastrous scenarios where you’re going to conflict in a certain way. Whether you’re on shade being cheated on or carrying an evidence with your best friend, it’s never going be a happy scene, is it?
“But I’ve had therapy and we understanding with things so many improved now. If we feel there’s any uncanny tragedy or not a unequivocally good vibe going on, we only mislay myself from a situation.
It doesn’t take prolonged in Megan’s association to know she’s a good chairman – a sweetheart, unequivocally – and so it’s entertaining to hear her articulate with common clarity and perspective.
This has been a quite formidable year for her personally, following a genocide of ex-boyfriend Mike Thalassitis in March, who she antiquated for many of 2018.
A PARTICULARLY DIFFICULT YEAR
Megan, 27, has never oral publicly about a tragedy and it’s finished transparent forward of a pronounce that she won’t – can’t – pronounce about it today. However, she does connote to it, observant she’s had veteran assistance to support her.
“Obviously, this year I’ve had a few small panic attacks,” she says, cautiously. “I’ve had therapy, given as many as we have people around me to pronounce to, vocalization to someone we don’t unequivocally know only helps me to understanding with emotions and put things in a right place.”
Alongside therapy, giving adult celebration has been pivotal in branch things around. In her bestselling 2018 journal Mouthy, Megan wrote about regulating ethanol to “rid demons” and motionless to quit totally during a start of this year.
“I realised we didn’t wish to be doing that any more,” she says. “I would go out and get paralytic. I’m articulate downing a Jägerbombs like we would not believe. we don’t know how we did it.
“I was necking them 3 in a line, tequila, Sambuca… And we was waking adult in a morning with my face all distended from a alcohol. I’m coeliac and I’d constantly have a bad swell from a night out. Some nights I’d go to a toilet, be ill and afterwards go behind and lift on drinking. we was abusing my body.”
She says a luminary lifestyle with a unconstrained events and giveaway bars can be dangerous.
“It’s constant. There are events on all a time in London and given we get shaken going to things, I’d down my drinks quickly. we used to consider if we didn’t have a splash it was going to be a balderdash night, so I’d splash quite to get drunk.
“And afterwards a morning after is only a misfortune feeling. I’m a disaster and we can’t understanding with it. It indeed gives me stress now only meditative about it, so we can’t do that to myself any more.”
The all-new Megan is anticipating that holding partial in The X Factor: Celebrity, that started on ITV final night, will give her a second chance.
I used to consider if we didn’t have a splash it was going to be a balderdash night, so I’d splash quite to get drunk.
Music has always been her initial adore – she’s been plugging divided for years writing, recording, working and looking for a mangle as a nation artist – and this is an event to uncover there is some-more to her than sensitivity and drama.
Anyone who has seen her sing live will know she has a truly pleasing voice and that her self-penned songs are quirky, crafty and catchy, though Megan realises she has some-more to infer than most.
“I know people decider me from a shows I’ve been on, though we was flourishing adult on telly, creation mistakes, observant foolish things.
“It’s formidable entrance from existence TV and channel over into music, though we feel a uncover could presumably be that indicate for me. Like, fully. I’m only so happy X Factor came up. we feel like people are going to unequivocally see my adore for song and how happy it creates me.”
Are people astounded when they hear her sing for a initial time? “Always. They’re like: ‘Oh my god, we pronounce like a chav though your voice sounds so lovely.’”
Another pierce in her bid to be taken severely has been a thespian picture renovate – a Essex uniform of large hair, large lips and lashings of feign tan has been ditched. Megan had a filler in her lips dissolved and has deleted a raft of photos she can no longer bear to demeanour at.
“I’m ashamed looking behind during some of my aged pictures. we spent 3 years pumping it in, pumping it in, thinking: ‘They’re not large enough, let’s get some more.’
“I became spooky with my lips. I’d take a print of myself and if we didn’t consider they looked large adequate I’d make them bigger with an modifying app.
“Honestly we consider we had physique dysmorphia, given when we demeanour behind during cinema of myself now we am horrified. we demeanour like a duck. we don’t know how they didn’t strike into things! we can’t trust what we looked like.
PINNACLE OF HER CAREER
“And no one could tell me. No one. Not my silent or anyone. It sounds pathetic, though we suspicion I’d demeanour nauseous though them.”
She remembers opening for Michael Bublé in Hyde Park final summer and how it should have been a apex of her career so far.
“But each title a subsequent day was about me and my large lips. I’d left my pursuit on TOWIE to unequivocally pound this and so to have all turn about my lips was upsetting. we wish people to be articulate about my voice – we don’t wish people looking during my lips.
“I consider we realised we was never going to be taken severely while we had fillers, so we motionless they had to go. we had so many in there. we didn’t only have one lot of dissolvent, we had to have two!
“I suspicion no one was going to like me though them though after a second week, we saw myself and thought: ‘Hold on, we demeanour all right.’ we consider I’d mislaid steer of what a normal face looked like.
“I was perplexing to cover myself into something we wasn’t. And now we consider it looks ridiculous. we know we demeanour improved healthy and we will never go down that track again. It’s only not nice.”
Performing is a dream Megan has harboured given childhood. Her younger years were spent going to several auditions and travelling all over a nation for singing competitions.
In 2009 she got by to a semi-finals of BGT as one half of twin Harmony and finished it as distant as a six-chair plea on X Factor in 2014, though zero came from either. By a time Ex On The Beach came adult a following year, she felt she was using out of options.
“I was changing jobs each week doing bar work and we didn’t unequivocally have any money. we got a pursuit during an estate representative and we hated it, we had no idea what to do. But afterwards MTV messaged me. They’d seen me out and about and it started from there.
“I remember we was in a unequivocally tedious assembly training about estate agents and we got a phone call. we immune myself, took a call and they told me we was on a uncover and drifting to Mexico. we walked behind into a assembly and said: ‘Sorry, I’ve gotta go.’ And we never went back.”
I was perplexing to cover myself into something we wasn’t. And now we consider it looks ridiculous.
She says if she’d famous what lay ahead, she competence never have boarded a flight. “I suspicion it was a new dating uncover – that’s how they representation it to we – and we was only happy to get away.
“I’d only damaged adult with my beloved and was unequivocally low and dissapoint and it substantially wasn’t a right time for me to go on it. Honestly, that uncover is agg.
“I consider if I’d famous what it was from a start we substantially wouldn’t have finished it given we would have been disturbed about my ex entrance on. He didn’t, though they brought on a lady he’d slept with so it was only as bad.”
The barbarous army on CBB followed before Megan assimilated TOWIE as a best partner of Chloe Meadows. She spent a violent 18 months on a uncover before quitting in 2017 after experiencing profanation and heartbreak and losing friends in a process.
“Maybe it was a blessing in costume given we left meaningful who my genuine friends were. we schooled that it’s not all about carrying a large organisation of girls, it’s about carrying people we trust.
Book we read?
I’ve not review a book in so long. we consider it’s my own. No joke.
Movie we watched?
Bridesmaids. My favourite film of all time.
Box set we watched?
Manifest. I’ve scarcely finished it. It’s unequivocally good, about a craft going missing.
Time we were drunk?
Probably a culmination of Celebs Go Dating in February.
Time we cried?
A few nights ago on theatre when we was articulate about my grandad.
Kiss we had?
Ha! From my silent final night observant how unapproachable she was of me.
“Most of a time on TOWIE we felt like we was in a corner. There would be times when everybody would be all right with me, though when me and Pete separate a whole expel incited opposite me. And bear in mind what happened with me and him [Pete was held sexting other women].
“It was creation me so vexed – a play and arguments over a stupidest things that on a uncover turn a misfortune thing in a world.
“I only got to a indicate where it was not what we wanted to be doing. we wanted to be doing certain things, surrounding myself with certain people.”
Travelling to Nashville in 2017 to film her fly-on-the-wall uncover There’s Something About Megan valid to be a branch point. She found somewhere she felt during home and it renewed her integrity to make it in music.
“I felt like we belonged there. No joke, Nashville was a indicate where we pronounced to myself: ‘I can’t be working [like that] and losing my s**t about stupid things any more.’
“I came behind in such a good headspace. Everyone was finally saying what we desired to do and staying on TOWIE would have meant being dragged behind into drama.
“Me and Pete separate adult again and we only thought: ‘I don’t wish to be doing this and carrying my personal life on camera,’ so we finished a preference to leave median by a array and I’ve never once regretted it.
“To make it in a US we need to be a initial or be totally different. Well, I’m really a initial Essex lady perplexing to moment it in Nashville! As prolonged as we have got a good story behind a song and we sing from a heart, it’s country. All of my songs are relatable.
CRACKING THE MUSIC INDUSTRY
“If anyone ever wants to know anything about my personal life, they only need to listen to a lyrics in my songs, given that’s where all my small secrets are.”
Standing in front of Simon Cowell again for The X Factor: Celebrity 10 years after that initial BGT try-out was an romantic knowledge – not to discuss nerve-wracking. Viewers will see her opening on Saturday.
“I always feel like Simon is a one. I’ve been perplexing to moment a song attention for years and unexpected I’m there singing for him in his garden in Malibu and we couldn’t trust we was there. The whole day was emotional.
“His residence is unreal. It’s all white and we adore that given my residence is, too, though his is on another level. All potion windows, large fireplaces… Just perfection.”
She says she spasmodic sees a girls who finished her life a wretchedness during propagandize and takes some compensation in a fact she’s come out on top.
“When we initial got my Range Rover, we was pushing down my highway and one of a girls was pulling out in this really… I’m not mugging small cars off given I’ve had a KA, though apparently I’m in this Range Rover.
“Anyway, she was in this small smashed car. And as we gathering past we held her eye and we thought: ‘Good.’ She’ll know. They’ll all know who they are. And we only consider I’ve got zero to be indignant about now.”
- Watch The X Factor: Celebrity, Saturdays, ITV.
Stockists: River Island (riverisland.com), Topshop (topshop.com), New Look (newlook.com)
GOT a story? RING The Sun on 0207 782 4104 or WHATSAPP on 07423720250 or EMAIL email@example.com