COLUMBUS, OH—Marveling on a indian soundness of a establish lounging in Goodale Park, sources reliable Friday that homeless male Eddie Kowalcek had a really good summer time tan going. “Wow, that male simply seems to be unimaginable,” mentioned Spencer Dawson, 26, including that a uniformly dark-skinned homeless schizophrenic should have spent months hypocrisy on a strand to erect adult such a flawless golden-brown pores and skin tone. “Significantly, we scarcely need to ask him what his tip is, as a outcome of we routinely can’t keep outdoor for larger than 15 mins with out burning. However this male is presumably high peculiarity simply shower within a rays outdoor of his tent with out even a dab of sunscreen. You’d suspect he would presumably overheat with that full beard, too, however nope. God, we seem like full shit successive to him.” At press time, Dawson begrudgingly supposed that some people simply have all of a luck.